Forever Fae 1 Read online

  “How were they when you left them?” I whispered to Remmie, my head still planted against his heavily muscled shoulder. “Were they in much pain?”

  He allowed a minute to pass.

  “They will be fine.”

  “But what if they’re hurt worse than you think?”

  “They will be fine, Isame.”

  “Remmie!” Nole was apparently annoyed by our conversation. He had still heard us even though he was, perhaps, several hundred yards ahead of us at this point.

  “Remmie,” I breathed, inclining my head. Would Nole really kill me for talking with them? I didn’t think so. “Are you sure they will survive?”

  He nodded once, slowly.

  “Was it you? Did you do it?” I desperately hoped it wasn’t. He met my eyes and then looked ahead.

  “Please tell me. I need to know.”

  “Need to know who you must hate?” he whispered into my ear. His breath tickled and warmed my insides. He shook his head. “It was me. Be grateful it was. I am faster than the others and I was able to get to them first. The others might not have been so careful.”

  No, not Remmie! It was impossible for me to contain my shock and absolute dismay. All I could do was look away and remind myself how foolish I was being. The savages were cold and ruthless. I had to stick to the plan and lose them as soon as the opportunity presented itself. Find Henry and my father and brother.

  “So there you have it, the person onto whom you can focus your hate is me. Do you feel better for that knowledge?” His tone was as sharp as a blade.

  I slapped him hard across his face. He stopped his horse, but refused to look me in the eye. I hit him again. Remmie didn’t even flinch. Channeling all of my anger, I beat on his chest until I reached exhaustion. He cupped my chin and pulled my face up to meet his. I’d never felt so conflicted in my life. I was hurt and angry and I wanted him to embrace me and offer me comfort, but he was the very person I couldn’t stand to look at in that moment. I didn’t know what to do with myself. Forgiving him meant never forgiving myself. If only I could stop my growing feelings for him.

  At midday, the men stopped to relieve themselves and give the horses water. I was half asleep, leaned up against Remmie’s chest. I pretended to sleep, not wanting to engage any of the men. I had to come to terms with my feelings—good and bad—and then leave the savages forever. But I had to pick the right moment.

  “I told you she’s bewitched us,” Nole said.

  “I don’t think so. This girl’s not magical, Nole, not in the way you think. Can’t you see that?”

  Remmie said.

  “Look at her body. Not a single scar or scratch. Every injury she had mysteriously gone overnight.

  What does that tell you?”

  I felt Remmie’s shoulders rise slightly.

  “We’re going to hand her over to the king.” Nole’s words were firm and unyielding.

  “Of course,” Remmie mumbled. “Will he hurt her?”

  “I think we both know the answer to that question.”

  “And you’re OK with this?” Remmie asked their leader.

  “She has me under her spell too. You would be wise to distance yourself. She will betray us all in the end. They all do.” The bitterness in his voice was obvious. I wondered who had hurt him so much that he might regard females with such disdain.

  “The others, what do they say?”

  “There’s nothing to say. They will do their duty. As will you.”

  I heard Otis and Roland talking and laughing in the distance, and then the crunching of dirt and pebbles from under a boot as Nole walked away from us.

  “You can open your eyes now.” Remmie’s hushed words and silky smooth voice made me shiver.

  I continued to pretend to sleep.

  “I’m not a fool, Isame. Your breathing is noticeably different when you’re sleeping.” He shook me gently. “By the way, you snore.”

  “I wasn’t pretending, exactly. I was just resting.”

  “Right.”

  “Can I ask you a question?”

  He sighed. “You have nothing but questions. You may ask; I can’t promise a reply.”

  “Why did he call me a fairy?” I shifted in my seat to face him.

  “I can’t say.”

  “OK then. Will you tell me why you are taking me to your king?”

  “You should wash up.” He hopped off, leaving me alone high atop his tall, black steed. I rolled onto my stomach, dangling my feet over the side, searching for the ground. I pushed off, taking a leap of faith, and landed on my rear with a painful thump.

  As I rubbed my newly injured backside, I watched Remmie saunter away from me and considered the gravity of what he had done to me and mine. Did I forgive him? I knew I couldn’t. It was unbelievably disloyal to my family for allowing myself to care for him, and yet, the thought of pushing him away made me feel such despair that I might just be better off dead. How could I hate the only man I had ever wanted?

  As much as it pained me to admit to it, I did want him. Very much.

  Chapter 10

  AT THE BASE of a glorious series of white-capped mountains stood a small village, and at its center was a large, dilapidated building that was brown in color with patches of furry green moss around its base. It had an amazingly colorful roof of wooden squares in red, brown, and green overlapping one another. A large sign hung above its open door, and it read “White Tail In,” the final n faded from view.

  Around the main building stood several small cabins and a couple of larger ones with barns and fences. A handful of other buildings and homes decorated the nearby area.

  “Where are we?” I said to no one in particular.

  “Perces,” Nole said.

  “Are you speaking to me again?”

  He sighed. “Apparently, I am.” He dropped down from his horse and continued walking toward the inn. “We’ll stop here for the night and hit the mountains in the morning.”

  “The mountains?” I said, my voice breaking.

  “The mountains.”

  I gulped as I stared up at them. Surely he meant to go around them. Did they not know about the ice monsters? They could rip us all to shreds with a single swipe of their oversize claws. I opened my mouth to tell him but stopped. I would do nothing to protect them. If the monsters attacked I would use the distraction to secure my escape. I almost smiled just thinking about it. If the monsters hurt them, they’d deserve it. Wouldn’t they? Of course. I wouldn’t allow myself to feel conflicted over it, either.

  Inside the inn, there was a single female server. She carried too much weight and wore a dress too small for her voluptuous shape. Her breasts practically overflowed from her neckline, which Otis couldn’t help but gawk at.

  “Daentarry,” she said to the men. “Don’t see your kind around here often.”

  “Is that a good thing?” Otis said with a smile.

  “I suppose we’ll see soon enough, won’t we.” She propped her hands on her full hips. “The special today is beef stew and dumplings. So what’ll it be? The special or the special?”

  “Hmm.” Otis smiled and raised his eyebrows. “I think I’ll go with the special.”

  “Good choice.”

  “And the rest of you lot?”

  “Five specials,” said Nole. “And water.”

  “Good ’nuf.”

  The rest of the inn was vacant save an old man drowning in ale in the far corner of the room. He hiccupped off and on before his head plummeted onto the table.

  “Should we help him?” I asked the men before chewing on my lip.

  “Help who?” Roland said, scanning the room.

  “That man over there.” I pointed to the passed-out man.

  “No, he’ll sleep it off. Too much ale. Good thing though, he wouldn’t have felt it, would he?” Otis laughed.

  I frowned at him but was then distracted by the lady returning with our food. Another man joined her, helping to carry the bowls and mugs. W
e ate quickly, all of us quiet while we chewed. When the bread was depleted to mere crumbs on the center of the table, I offered to get more.

  At the counter, the server leaned over to greet me.

  “Could we get some more bread, please?”

  The woman was quick, handing me a hard loaf less than a minute later.

  I stared at her, wanting to talk, but not sure what I wanted to say.

  “You need something else?”

  I shook my head and started to turn around but stopped and turned my head to face her. “The mountains,” I whispered. “I heard stories that ice monsters plague them. Is there any truth to that?”

  “Why? You plan on going over them?”

  I leaned in and quieted my voice even further. “Any words of advice on how to stay alive on the mountain?”

  “Why are you whispering?” She quirked an eyebrow as if she was trying to understand me. “You don’t want the men you’re with to survive the mountains, do you?”

  I glanced over my shoulder. Nole eyed me, but he continued to speak with Roland so he was, at least partially, distracted. Good thing. I didn’t want to risk him hearing. Deep inside, I didn’t want them to die, but after what they’d done—kidnapping me and hurting those I cared for—I couldn’t allow myself to consider them anymore. It was me or them. Plain and simple.

  “Can you help me?”

  “Don’t carry a weapon or anything that looks like one. If they see you as a threat they’ll tear you to pieces. And don’t run away from them. Back away instead. ’Course this is all stuff I heard secondhand.

  Never stupid enough to travel the mountains, myself.”

  “Right. Thanks for your help.”

  “Us ladies need to stick together,” she said with a wink.

  I smiled at her and brought the bread back to the table. Nole and Roland stopped talking the second I sat down. From then on, the conversation around the table was forced. So when they all decided to go to their rooms, I couldn’t wait to get moving. Remmie volunteered to share with me. I almost protested. Out of all of them, he would be the one to wear me down, or make me stray from my plan. Something about him drew me to him like a bee to a flower. I wanted him in ways I shouldn’t. I didn’t know how to reconcile those feelings.

  He led me to the room and opened the door, walking in ahead of me. What a gentleman. I wasn’t used to men treating me like anything less than a lady. I sighed and followed him. Inside, I lifted my hands together expecting to be tied, particularly after Henry and my family had tried to rescue me. But he scoffed at my hands and headed for the bed.

  “I hope you don’t expect to share the bed with me?”

  “You’re welcome to use the floor.” He peeled out of his shirt.

  My eyes glued to the lines of muscle on his abdomen and the bulge of his chest. It surprised me to find the painted ink on his arms and neck ended where they reached the hems of his shirt but didn’t continue onto his chest. A strange tingling sensation built in my stomach and traveled lower. I gasped and turned away quickly as he undid the tie to his pants.

  He chuckled behind me and I heard the bed creak as he crawled on top of it.

  “You really expect me to use the floor?”

  “I don’t expect you to do anything.”

  “I’m an engaged woman.” That fact had almost escaped me, even as Henry had tried to rescue me.

  No matter how much I didn’t want to marry him, I couldn’t climb into a bed with another. Even if it was just to sleep. And worse, the man was half—if not completely—naked.

  “Oh, right. Which one was he? I’m assuming he was one of the younger ones. The dark-haired one?

  With dark eyes?”

  I crossed my arms across my middle and tried to stay calm and unaffected by the fact that if I turned around I might see all of his naked body. I’d never seen one before and I had to admit to myself that I was incredibly curious—especially about his.

  “Why haven’t you married him yet?”

  “I only just accepted him.”

  “I see. Why is it that your race waits to marry? If you decide you want to marry someone, why not do it then and there?”

  I sighed. “Will you please cover yourself so I can turn around?”

  “Go ahead. I’m decent.”

  I turned around and saw him lying in bed with a fur blanket over his middle and his upper thighs.

  “Please tell me you’re wearing something other than that blanket?”

  “Would you like to take a peek?” he said without a smile. I couldn’t tell if he was teasing me or not.

  I assumed he was, but then again…

  Frowning, I propped my hands on my hips. “Please behave.”

  “Fine. Now answer my question.”

  “I don’t know,” I began. “It’s just the way we do things. We get engaged and plan a wedding and then we have a ceremony a fortnight later. We invite friends and family and celebrate with food and wine. The husband and his bride then ride off to their new home on horseback. It’s quite a big event really.”

  “It sounds riveting.”

  “You’re making fun.”

  The corners of his eyes crinkled and his face softened as he smiled brighter and wider than I’d ever seen him. It made my heart quicken and my muscles ache in places that made me tingle. “So tell me, Remmie, what do your people do when they decide to marry?”

  “If I want a woman forever I would tell her and we’d be done with it. She’d cut my hair and keep it as a token and I’d enter her over and over until I fell asleep.”

  My eyes widened and my jaw dropped. “Please, sir, you can spare me those details.”

  “And your fiancé won’t be entering you on your wedding night?”

  “Can we not talk about anyone entering anyone else right now? Or ever? Please.”

  “Suit yourself.” He shifted in bed and closed his eyes, yawning widely before rubbing his chest with his hand. For a second I imagined his hand as mine. I shook my head furiously to stop myself.

  “The ink on yours arms and neck? Does it really indicate how many men you’ve killed?”

  He stared at me so long that I had to look away. Just when I assumed he wouldn’t respond, he did.

  “Your people call us savages. They assume we are ruthless and have no hearts. That we kill all that stand in our way.”

  “Don’t you?”

  He scoffed and put his hands behind his head. The muscles in his arms stretched and expanded, causing the tingling low and deep in my stomach to return. It made me want to sit, to cross my legs, to run away. Anything but stay here and look at him for another second. I didn’t trust myself with him.

  “Those of us with a speck of a conscience mark our flesh to remind us of the lives we have taken and the families we’ve affected. I can kill without hesitation, but that doesn’t mean when I have a moment to think about my actions that I don’t wish things turned out differently. Taking someone’s life is not easy. To see the life drain from their eyes…” Remmie glanced at the window and his face changed. It softened somehow. “Well,” he continued, “it’s the hardest part of who I am and what I do.”

  “And James?”

  “He’s the only man I’ll never regret killing. I’d have pissed on his body if I thought the others wouldn’t stop me. I’ll not mark my skin for him.”

  “So the marks aren’t at all like trophies.”

  He looked at me like I’d slapped him. “It’s amazing the lies your race believe about mine.”

  I suppose it really was. I knew nothing about these men, other than what I’d read, and I’d believed it all. I was almost ashamed that I had accepted the information as absolute truths.

  “What do the marks mean? Is that your language?”

  He nodded once. “The dates of the kills.”

  “How…how many dates are there?”

  “You and your questions.” He closed his eyes and took a long breath. “Forty-two.”

  “What will y
ou do when you run out of space?”

  He chuckled. “I don’t know. I hadn’t given it much thought. I never intended to kill so many people that I run out of skin to mark.” He shifted and the blanket lowered on his middle to show a faint line of hair below his belly button.

  I lowered myself to the floor and propped my head up on my hands. This man would be the end of me. The floorboards were rough and weathered, and every time I moved I swear my skin took a splinter.

  I waited for Remmie to go to sleep, wondering if I could slip out tonight. I worried I wouldn’t get far before they caught me again. They’d only come to my home to get me, and I’d risk hurting the rest of my family. No. I would stay and take my chances on the mountains.

  Hours later, I couldn’t stand the cold, hard floor anymore. And as much as I didn’t want to admit it to myself, I couldn’t stand sharing the same space with Remmie and not be near him.

  I climbed into bed beside him, holding my breath the entire time. I removed all my clothes but for my sheath and I made sure to push the blanket down between us so we wouldn’t have any skin-to-skin contact. I didn’t trust myself any more than him.

  It took a long time to fall asleep. I slept deeper than I ever had until he shifted in bed and the creaking bed woke me. When I opened my eyes, my gaze met his. My stomach danced and the ache from earlier on, the one deep and low in my belly, came back and it traveled farther down, between my legs.

  The moonlight streamed in through the window, highlighting the planes of his cheekbones. His eyes twinkled.

  “I won’t be able to stop myself from touching you if you keep looking at me like that.”

  That made two of us. “I thought I wasn’t your type.”

  He threw the blanket off and rolled on top of me. A thin sheath separated us once again, only now I didn’t know how long it would stay between us, or if I wanted it to. I drew in a breath and licked my lips, trying to find the willpower to tell him to get off me and to make myself want him to.

  “Isame, I have a suspicion that you are every man’s type.” He shifted his body, the bulge between his legs pressing between mine. I gasped, shocked by how good it felt and how much I wanted him to move his body again. But I held my breath, knowing it might be over just as quickly as it began.